So, here’s what I’ve discovered about the ocean.
I’ve always had a kind of love/hate relationship with it. I always try to relate when people say “Oh, I LOVE the beach!” “The beach is my favorite place to go on vacation!”
I’ve never felt that connection to it. My happy place would be the mountains or the forest because I feel calm there and at ease. But here’s what I discovered on my latest visit to the ocean.
The love/hate relationship is due to my love of nature. Anything nature-related I feel a connection to. It’s where I find peace and where I feel God. Thus, by default I appreciate the beach because it is a vast piece of nature.
The beach is hard though because it doesn’t settle me. It doesn’t relax something in me when I’m there.
Instead, it does the opposite. It stirs things up inside me that I don’t want stirred up.
It makes me contemplate life, and God, and the future, relationships, and deep things that are hard and complex.
The ocean doesn’t settle me. It pulls me in. It draws out the deepest thoughts. The most complex fears. The hardest things I deal with understanding. It teases them out until I am caught in the undertow of one though after another.
It’s good. Yes, good. But hard too.
It connects me to the things settled below the surface of myself, and washes them up onto the shores of my consciousness.
The ocean is fluid, mysterious and deep. It swirls my thoughts every this way and that. It’s complex and beautiful.